Vancouver Pride (and prejudice)

I have never participated in the Vancouver Pride Parade & Festival. This is mainly because of competing priorities and having not yet mastered the art of being in two places at once. The other reason for my lack of attendance is that the marketing I see and follow-up articles/news stories I read have yet to resonate with me enough to convince me that it is good enough to make it a priority. I begin to question if promoting stereotypes is really beneficial for the LBGTTQI community’s reputation/future. But having never attended, I can’t comment accurately on the real experience, atmosphere, benefits, or results. So instead of this post being an ignorant opinion piece, I wanted to share two different opinions that I found very helpful in educating my view.

Mat Mutchnik, co-creater of Will & Grace, wrote this in his Huffington Post article “Where is my Martin Luther Queen?:

“Dykes on bikes, Tarzana Trannies, Jewish Leather Daddies and Kathy Griffin’s mom. Don’t get me wrong. I love these people. Let’s call them the ‘Usual Suspects.’ They fought for my rights and taught me how to dance. But they should no longer be representing “the pride.” It’s a different time. [...] What I’m trying to say is that “unremarkable” mainstream people are gay, too. So I cringe when a local newsperson shoves a microphone in the face of some young 95-pound twink. The twink looks into the camera and screams into the reporter’s microphone: “Get down here now. The drinks are big. But you know what’s bigger…” He laughs in a high-pitched cackle and his “girlfriends” join in. I wish they’d read more and drink less.

I’m depressed. Why is this the voice speaking for me?

I know there were many types of interesting, smart people on the parade route showing their support. But guess what, guys and gals? None of you have a loud enough, strong enough or powerful enough voice to be heard over the thumping techno backbeat of the big gay parade. This is a huge problem. Sad, but true. The mainstream media still has no better choice but to showcase the extremes of gay life. I mean, imagine if we used the Mardi Gras as the singular way we’d depict straight folk. The public would be lead to believe that all men wear jock straps on their heads and [what] all women like to do is show us their tits. So you understand my pain when I see one of the “usual suspects” on the news? Is he supposed to be my leader? He’s not my leader!”

Joe.My.God., one of the top American bloggers of gay culture and politics, writes an annual “essay” following the New York Pride Parade called “Watching the Defectives.” I have tried to trim down his thoughts below:

“… Why don’t the papers ever show the NORMAL gay people? Where are the bankers and lawyers? Why must all the coverage be drag queens and leather freaks in assless chaps?”

And every year, the logical answer is that bankers and lawyers are boring to look at and that pictures of marching Gap employees don’t sell newspapers. There’s no sinister media agenda intent on making gay people look ridiculous, no fag-hating cabal behind the annual front page explosion of sequins and feathers. It’s just good copy. Drag queens are interesting. Even the bad ones. Especially the bad ones. [...]

These people that want to “fix” Pride don’t understand the role that Pride parades have come to play. Initially, the gay parade was about visibility. It was about safety in numbers, and more importantly, “normalcy” in numbers. It was about the idea that if only straight America could see us, could just SEE US, that they’d love us. And accept us. That if we’d mass and march by the righteous millions, the sheer unstoppable force of our collective image would topple bigotry. Would right wrongs. Would stop hate. Of course, that didn’t happen then and it doesn’t happen now. [...]

So where does that leave us? Are we post-Pride? Is the parade just a colossally long waste of a miserably hot summer day? Is the Pride parade just an event that does a better job of moving chicken-on-a-stick than it does of moving hearts? [...]

Because even if Pride doesn’t change many minds in the outside world, it’s our PARTY, darlings. It’s our Christmas, our New Year’s, our Carnival. It’s the one day of the year that all the crazy contingents of the gay world actually come face to face on the street and blow each other air kisses. And wish each other “Happy Pride!” Saying “Happy Pride!” is really just a shorter, easier way of saying “Congratulations on not being driven completely [...] insane! Way to go for not taking a rifle into a tower and taking out half the town! Well done, being YOURSELF!” [...]

A co-worker of mine heard me discussing my Pride plans last weekend and said, “I really don’t understand what it is you are proud about. I mean, you all say that you are born that way, so it’s not like you accomplished anything.” She wasn’t being mean, just genuinely curious, and I think that a lot of gay people probably feel the same way. [...] Outside of my personal experiences, I am proud of my tribe as a group. Sometimes I think that gay people are more creative, more empathic, more intuitive, more generous, and more selfless than anybody else on the planet. Sometimes I think that if an alien culture were surveying our planet from light years away, they might classify gay people as an entirely separate species of humans. It’s easy to spot us because of our better haircuts. But sometimes I think we are the worst people in the entire world when it comes to standing up for each other.”

Both articles are worth a read in further detail to really understand their points of view. For me, I am proud that I live in a province (and country) where Pride, homosexuals serving in the military, and same-sex marriages can even take place. Many other cities, like Moscow and Tel Aviv, are not as safe – so I am proud of where I live and am glad others don’t take that for granted. It is perfect? No. But it’s something we should celebrate – together. If Pride allows the community to come together to stand up for each other, then rock on. Obviously there are stereotypes that highlight the negative aspects, but … don’t all cultural/racial/lifestyle stereotypes do that? Standing up for what you believe in is important – whether it’s on the streets or in the boardroom.

Note: I understand that commenting on this post may not be ideal for some readers, but I would love to hear your thoughts. Please feel free to e-mail me at matthew.corker [at] gmail [dot] com to carry on this conversation. Or, someone who might be able to answer more of your questions could be found at:

• Gay Vancouver
• The Gay and Lesbian Business Association of BC
• Queer Community Groups in Vancouver

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