Looking for love in all the wrong places
It is hard to walk down the street, read the morning blog roll, or sign on to Facebook today without being inundated with phrases and images of Valentine’s Day. But these great bloggers have reminded me that this “love” thing has been incorrectly over-emphasized.
No – this isn’t me being bitter. Quite the opposite actually! The random acts of kindness I have seen today have done nothing but warm my heart.
That being said, we too often make the verb “to love” into a noun forgetting that love is about action. We are quick to personify love (e.g. you’re my love, you’re the love of my life, etc) or use one of the many idioms associated with it (e.g. for the love of, in love with, make love, etc). But love (the noun) is a feeling that is the reward for our behaviour. Not the other way around.
To help in understanding this, think of love as a smile. When something funny or positive happens in your life, you begin to smile. It is rare that the act of you smiling causes something funny or positive to happen in your life. (Rare, but not impossible). Knowing this, when you spend time with your partner, cook dinner together, take a walk on the seawall, or just send a quick note to remind them you are thinking about them, you begin to love them. The feeling is derived from your behaviour.
So, this Valentine’s Day, I encourage you to have a great time with your friends, family, and partner without looking to find love. The feeling of love will come only after you act in loving ways. 
“Love is not a token of affection. It’s not even a real thing. It’s a word. So don’t you try and buy it out with a ring cause it’s a verb – to love someone. Open up and let them in. Just don’t be afraid to set them free again.” Common Pleasure by Jason Mraz.
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Great Post, Thanks Matt!